By CHARLIE WYETT
JERMAIN DEFOE is finding solace on the football pitch after the most traumatic three months of his life.
The England and Spurs striker flew home from England’s Euro 2012 camp in Poland following the death of his 49-year-old father Jimmy from throat cancer.
And Defoe, 29, then broke off from Tottenham’s tour of the United States in July to be with his family after his cousin Hannah was electrocuted after she dived into a hotel swimming pool.
The player dedicated his winning goal in England’s 2-1 win over Italy last month to his cousin as she would have celebrated her 21st birthday the next day.
Defoe, with the England team preparing for Friday’s opening World Cup qualifier in Moldova, yesterday spoke with great courage and admitted he has questioned his approach to life following these latest tragedies.
The striker’s half-brother Jade, 26, also died in 2009 after falling into a coma following a street attack in east London.
He said: “It has been difficult for my family. It has been hard, especially with my dad. From day one, when he was diagnosed, I was with him. I am only 29 and to deal with that was quite difficult.
“I had to tell dad, ‘It will be OK. Be positive, keep praying and have faith’. I have always known about cancer but to be around someone who has cancer and to see what it does in such a short space of time was mad. It makes you think about your life.
“I have got a big family and we have always been close. These things do make you think about life and what is important.
“Now the only time I am really at peace is when I am training and playing.
“Obviously when you are on your own you start thinking about stuff. You think about your life, you don’t know for sure whether you will be here tomorrow.
“My cousin was only 20. I was asking questions like ‘why is this happening?’.
“I was in America with Tottenham and had to fly home again to be with my family.
“She was electrocuted in a pool. I have never heard of that before.
“Family is important, especially when you have lost your dad and your cousin. It’s normal to think like that.
“I remember Craig Bellamy saying there was more to life than football in terms of family. When you are young nothing is more important than football but, as you get older, you get married, have kids and lose people.
“Then you realise your family is more important. This comes with age.”
Defoe, who returned from his father’s funeral to rejoin the squad at Euro 2012, also thanked England coach Roy Hodgson.
He added: “The manager was brilliant before the Euros. We had a training camp and every afternoon I got a car to go to the Royal Marsden Hospital where I would spend a few hours with my dad.
“I said to the manager could I go for one day and he said ‘make sure you see your dad every afternoon and get back for the meetings’.
“That was really nice. It was brilliant. It helps when you feel you can approach the manager, speak about other things and not just football.”
England take on Moldova in Chisinau before returning to face Ukraine in another qualifier at Wembley on Tuesday.
Defoe is hoping to win his 50th cap against the world’s 137th-ranked team. His goals ratio is not bad when you consider he has scored 16 times for England — particularly as Defoe has started only 17 times for his country.
He added: “What can I do? For a player it is important to stay focused and if you don’t start games, being a forward, it is important to come on and try and make an impact.
“Especially at tournaments where it is about the squad and not just the team.
“Players can come on, make an impact and try and win the game. Against Italy, I came on at half-time and got the winner.
“If I was one of those players that looked at the stats and started sulking, I would not have done what I have done.
“It is important to stay in the squad and, when you get in the team, you have to try and stay there.
“Before games people ask whether I get nervous. To be honest, I don’t get nervous. I just enjoy it. I am living the dream.
“I have worked hard over the years. When I was a kid I always wanted to play for my country and now I am here I will enjoy it.
“Life is short. While you are here it is important to enjoy the good times.”
